There’s nothing worse than someone ruining your day because of their ignorant and insensitive comments. They might not have meant to hurt your feelings in any way, but the damage has been done, and now it’s too late to go back. The most common of these comments are usually about our physical attributes. While most of us manage to shrug it off and reply with a joke, these comments usually sting deep inside.
Diet culture is something that needs to be a thing of the past, and to ensure that happens, you’re going to have to update yourself on how to make that possible. The first thing you need to do is ditch a few phrases that you’ve probably been using your entire life. There could be plenty of reasons why you’re still using them – maybe you’ve just never questioned these words as you’ve heard them repeatedly and simply incorporated them into your daily small talk. However, here are some phrases that need to go so that people – including you – don’t have to apologize for their body types and can feel comfortable in their own skin.
“I Feel/Look Fat.”
Everyone — well, almost everyone — has said this at some point in their lives. If you have, there’s no need to fret about it; just make sure that you’re not repeating the mistake again. Also, if you accidentally do utter something like “ugh, I feel so fat today”, don’t worry about it. The goal is to realize that having such a mindset is harmful to yourself and others, and as long as you’re doing that, you’ll move away from this phrase automatically. There’s nothing wrong about being fat, so saying it with a negative connotation in mind will definitely put you in a bad mood for the rest of the day. A slight gain in weight over the holidays isn’t going to be permanent anyway, so you’re better off saying something like you’re not feeling like your body is as good as it’d normally be right now.
“You Look Great! Did You Lose Weight?”
For far too long, we’ve treated losing weight as something victorious. You might have heard your friends comment positively about someone who lost weight recently. First off, it’s not exactly a good idea to comment on someone’s body if they haven’t asked for it already. Secondly, there’s no telling the reason behind that particular person’s weight loss or if they actually wanted to lose weight at all. A comment like this could put a damper on their mood. There could be all sorts of negative reasons behind someone’s loss in weight which includes eating disorders or a serious illness, so it’s in your best interest to make sure that the person actually had weight loss as their goal. If you’re not sure, it’s best to just tell them that they seem in a good mood lately and that you’re happy for them.
“You’d Look Better Without The Extra Weight”
While saying something like this might seem like a form of encouragement, you need to realize that you’re using the presumption that being fat is synonymous with being ugly. This couldn’t be further from the truth because beauty has nothing to do with a person’s body shape and saying otherwise will only make you look bad. Furthermore, the person you’re talking to will also start feeling bad about their body type if they’re big which is the exact opposite of what you wanted them to think and feel. Diet culture has made it the norm that being fat also means being unattractive, and leaving such negativity behind is vital. To do that, you’ll need to stop talking about how much weight a certain person has, especially if you’re uncertain how open they are to the subject. The best thing you can do if you want to brighten someone’s day is to simply tell them that you think they’re beautiful (that is, assuming you know the person because calling a stranger beautiful can be a rather awkward experience).
If you’re determined enough, you’ll catch yourself before you can say any of these, and that’ll make the difference to your day. You’ll find that you’ll have a much more positive outlook on your body shape as well as those of others, and at the end of the day, that’s always worth the effort you’ll put in.